My Love (Let me talk to you my love)

Oh how much i wanted you.


Oh how it killed me when you said no.


Killed me, to the extent that when you called me for the first time in 4 months,


I was willing to ditch (R) my first kiss


and we all know how important she was. How she had me fucked (from her effect on me) for about 3 years after



Now that i look back (M) on how i felt
i can't but wonder what magic you spelt.



but the magic is done babe, and so am I.



I see you now and can't help but think how weak you are, how life made you bitter.
It didn't help that your default setting was sarcastic bitch, was i gonna be the one putting up with all the insecurities? You changed though...



you see the sarcastic bitch was cute, because underneath it was a nice person, a beautiful, funny girl who wasn't afraid to sound foolish, when did all the insecurities pile up??????? we're supposed to grow more confident as we grow up,


yet with you only the sarcastic bitch grew, and the beautiful, confident part wasn't there to prserve her sanity.





AND i'm glad i missed the show.





If you are a firm believer in fate & that people will end up in the same place no matter which route/path they take then it wouldn't have made the tiniest difference if i was there.


And when i see what i wanted for myself i thank God that my dream didn't come true cuz honestly (M), I Don't want to be your hero anymore.

Doctors and Work

My office is in a building that has a lot of doctors, and although the building is in a relatively upscale area of town, it seems that some of those doctors do a lot of work with unions or something.

Several times a month as i'm leaving work at night i get greated with the sight of a young mother crying somewhere between the ground and second floor and EVERY SINGLE TIME it's because she can't afford to treat or hospitalize her kid, it's not like their beggars or professionals or anything, and the sight of them with their family around them looking that helpless makes me feel like shit.

to be at that stage where you can't afford to treat your kid is depressing, and yet a the same time it's quite... ummm....


shit.

Tags R' Us

Section 1 - Last 1s?

1. last beverage? Sugarless Coffee
2. last phone call? College Buddy (S)
3. last instant message? (N) checking if i was going to a certain outing, i didn't
4. last cd played? Amy Winehouse's debut album "Frank".
5. last time you cried? Drunk on Tequilla and being accused of being an asshole to an all-round great Gal, not sure if it was the tequilla or the girl.

Section 2 - 6 Have You Evers:

1. dated someone twice? In General i don't, but i did it once for revenge purposes
2.been cheated on? I think so
3. kissed someone & regretted it? Why?? now that u mention it i think i do
4. lost someone special? Family members and a girl i knew from school that i cared about
5. been depressed? i'm depressed on a daily basis :)
6. been drunk and threw up? twice in my lifetime so far

Section 3 - List 3 Favourite Colors

1. Blue
2. Brown
3. A tie between Dark Grey & Pink

Section 4 - This month have you (Past Month)

1. Made a new friend? mainly got back in touch with a lot of old ones
2. Fallen out of love? I wasn't in love aslan
3. Laughed until you cried? i teared up so yes
4. Met someone who changed your life? Sadly no
5. Found out who your true friends were? Nope
6. Is there something you want to tell someone? hmmm... i guess so, but do you really want to know??? i actually am more straightforward than i should be ( for my own good)
7. Would you kiss anyone on your top friends? If that means Kiss a female friend then yes, if it means anything else i'll kick your ass
8. How many people on your top friends do you know in real life? huh?
9. How many kids do you want to have? i'd rather have girls than boys but i guess ideally one of each
10. Do you have any pets? I'm allergic to cats and dogs, and i don't consider goldfish and reptiles pets so no i don't

Section Five - What Else

1. Do you wanna change your name? No, it's damn sexy baby
2. What did you do for your last birthday? previous night Went out at night to After 8 with a couple of the dudes, then on the actual day i went tanning in the morning, then lunch at sangria with some college buddies, then desert with auc buddies, then caught a movie with some more friends, it was good
3. What time did you wake up today? 7:10 am (first time i hit the snooze button was 7:10 am)
4.What were you doing at midnight last night? Driving home
5. Name something you CANNOT wait for? Finishing one of them Damn novels, peace of mind, Finding a girl who understands me and likes me for me.
6. Last time you saw your father? I see him all the time, we work together and i haven't moved out yet :(
7. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? Not sure if there's anything, if i give it more thought i'd probably tell you a couple of things though.
8.What are you listening to right now? Tristan Prettyman's live rendetion of " November"
9. Have you ever talked to Tom? Tom dah yeb2a khaltak
10. Have you ever talked about someone behind their back? I blog about them behind their back too
11. What’s the last piece of clothing you borrowed from anyone? My dad's polo shirt, ever since i lost weight i can't find summer stuff that fit
12. Who’s getting on your nerves right now? A lot of people but i choose to ignore them
13. Most visited webpage? Kitco.com, email, wikipedia (it's the devil)
14. Coke or Pepsi? Pepsi in egypt, coke elsewhere
15. Have you kissed or been kissed by anyone in the past week? Yes (usually kissed and being kissed go hand in hand)
16.Mac or PC? Never tried Mac, so Mac.




y'all been tagged

my visited countries map

where i've been so far






create your own visited country map
or check our Venice travel guide



2 continents that i've never set foot in
and 3 that i've only visited one country

good news is i've almost finished Europe :)

how sexy is your name

Your Name Is Too Too Sexy! :) Your name scored 186 in the "How Sexy Is Your Name Test"

How Sexy Is Your Name?

and that's just Kareem

wait till i tell you my family name baby ;)

Malice Rising

Did i mention that Cup Of Malice is back???


For now :)

Tagged Again

Tagged by 2 of my favorite girls Raghoooda and LoLo to do the "things you don't know about me" Tag

Ooooooh and Walaa tagged me before them bardo

update: LouLou Bardo Tagged me

Not a lot about me that people don't know but I’ll try


Here goes... my dignity

- I had asthma as a kid but you can't tell now, and definitely not by the way I smoke
-as a result I wasn't allowed to play an sports as a kid (the doctors restricted me from doing it)

- I studied to be a Danseur as a kid for about 2 months (that's a male ballet dancer for you simpler lot)
- The longest time I’ve spent going to the gym in a row was 3 weeks, 4 times a week

- I once kept checking that I set the alarm clock on the right time for 12 full minutes
- And I almost always have to re-check that the car doors are locked (even my friend's cars)
- and it doesn't help that the 2 times I forgot to do so I came back and found that I left the windows rolled down as well

- I can barely stand to listen to one song from the beginning to the end; I usually skip to the next song after a minute and a half

- Although I was at some point 45 kgs overweight (100 pounds) I was still quite flexible (I could and still can bring my foot above my head, not quite over it just barely on top of my head but still impressive in my book)

- I have extra sensitive skin (for the lack of a better word) which can be quite bothersome but comes in handy at some other times

- I adore girls with thin lips; I prefer thin lips to the fuller kind (unlike most men)
- I prefer fuller women to thinner ones (ya3ni 5 kilos overweight is better than 5 kilos underweight, 10 kgs overweight better than 10 kgs underweight and 20 kilos overweight better than dead)

- I can't whistle
-and I can't make bubbles with bubble gum (not once in my life was I able to make one)
- Until I was in high school I didn't know how to snap/click my fingers (I suddenly woke up and could)

- My confidence/self esteem level changes from 1-10 almost every other day

- I have a certain inclination to dislike exceptionally good looking people until they prove themselves worthy
- Naturally I’m not rather fond of extra-skinny people who eat more than I do (they make me feel like i got the shitty end of the stick)

speaking of which.... Why Is There Shit On Either Ends Of The Stick In The First Place???????? (i don't think i reeeeaaaally want to know though)




Now who do I tag??? It seems like everyone else has done this one

Mystery???

An attempt at writing without a certain thought or theory in mind

I am sitting at the café where I used to hang 2 years ago with this chick (H)

I am supposed to be working of possible schedules for working hours for my business as I’m not comfortable with the existing one

Instead I’m listening to tristian prettyman (a very cool female vocalist, similar to Jason mraz and jewel in style) and downloading songs

All of a sudden walks in this quite tall girl, with exceptionally black hair, white complexion and a black coat, she looks like (H) except her eyebrows aren’t thicker than mine :)

What is apparent is that I’m probably still not completely at peace over how much of an assholette she was to me ( I guess what goes around comes around) that’s the one thing that is keeping me from being bitter about this issue entire issue


Damn that girl smells fine (she just passed by me to greet her boyfriend )


Anyway…

Regarding work….. hold on I don’t wanna talk about work


Let’s talk women…


Yesterday I saw probably one of the hottest women in Cairo, not only saw her but she was dancing about 3 meters away from me, not with me but hey, can’t win ‘em all

It was the engagement of my best friend’s brother, and she was the sister of the bride, the much older sister, who also happens to be engaged.

Not only does she look like a goddess, she also dances pretty nicely.



What is it about a woman who can dance????



I also remember another woman at after-8 who is definetly in her mid-thirties, short and dark who used to drive me crazy, when ever I saw her dancing I’d get this silly, ridiculous smile on my face and I’d do my best not to look at her for longer than 3 seconds so as not to freak her out (imagine this drunk guy smiling at you for no apparent reason and smiling as if there’s no tomorrow) and the way she dances is just like that, like there is no tomorrow.

I don’t believe that crap about If someone is good at dancing then they must be good in bed, just as much as I don’t believe that people who finish their food quickly are bad in bed, cuz they’re not the type to savour/enjoy their food or cuz “they are clumsy vertically so they must be horizontally too”, I find that argument quite shallow, like saying if someone is bad at designing cars then he/she must be bad at designing clothes.


Anyway…


Back to the woman at after 8 and dancing and what it does to people, i don’t know why I like looking at people dancing, I am a bad dancer myself, mediocre at best, but it’s not like I find all dancing erotic, sometimes its innocent, sometimes you appreciate the fun someone’s having through dancing, sometimes it’s the chemistry between the dancing partners and sometimes it’s the beauty of the human body moving in such ways that I thought were impossible

I believe watching someone dance is one of the ways to understand a lot about them at that particular state, that is if they are good at expressing themselves through their body, or actually good at not letting their insecurities stop them from expressing it, I mean in my case I’m usually a much better dancer just by having a few drinks, I usually only feel like dancing when I’ve had a few drinks


They say the grass is greener on the other side (tristian prettyman sings alongside bushwalla)


Dancing couples. I was once dumped because I couldn’t dance, seems like quite a shallow reason to dump someone that you connect with better than anyone else you’ve ever met ( I guess she might have had other reasons that she thought were too ugly to mention)

Who do you think has got it worse, the partner who likes to dance but can’t do so with his/her loved one or the one who knows his/her partner likes doing something that they can’t do for them?



“Put your hands to my hands, put you knees to my knees
Put your eyes to my eyes, come one baybe compliment me

Cuz I don’t think that we
Should ever feel the need to worry
Ever get ourselves in a hurry
You know I love you, you know you love me”



This tristian chick sure knows how to sing, easy on the eyes too, you know when I first read the name I thought it was a guy (tristian from the interview with the vampire series by anne rice) (brad pitt’s character for those who didn’t read the book but saw the movie)

What are men Good For??

I was talking with a friend of mine over the mobile, i needed to end the call to get back to work

she is the kind of person who chooses to believe in the inherit goodness of people, borderline naive (and she has a quite innocent voice)

so that's why the ending was unexpected

the following conversation ensued

Me: you know they say Men shouldn't talk too much on the mobile (Actually I did read it in the paper that talking on the cell lowers fertility/virility)
Her: Why?? (suspicious tone)
Me: they say it's not good for you
Her: good for me? or good for you?
Me: well... actually it will affect both men and women
Her: how??

i don't want to shock her with talk about erections and virility so....

Me: they say it affects one of the functions of men
Her: what function?
Me: the primary/main role for men
Her: the primary function of men is to make money






LOL

[ am i the only one to find that reply hilarious???]



Not to mention that it is quite true :)

The year in review

Tempted by what Raghoooda and Juka did I decided to do the same list


Best Arabic Movie: I’m not really big on Arabic movies but I liked Ouija
Best English Movie: The Holiday and Crash as far as I remember
Newcomer of the year: Sick puppies or Zuzana Smatnova (I’m not sure if they are newcomers)
Album of the Year: Justin Timberlake’s and Cheb Mami’s are playing a lot on my ipod
Most played Song: 1) Distractions by Zero 7
2) In the Waiting Line by Zero 7
3) Hallili By Cheb Mami
4) Pocestny By Zuzana Smatanova
5) Sexy by Black Eyed Peas

Best Clip: Arabic: Al Asmarani by the love of my life Maya Nasri (Ya Mozza)
English: “Here It Goes Again” By Ok Go (funny and simple)

Books Read and Loved: Haunted By Chuck palahnuik, the unbearable lightness of being by Milan Kundera, Zakerat al Jasad by Ahlam Mostaghnami, I’ll update with the rest as I remember them

Best Outing: Slovakia in August with Andrea, our buddies’s I and L’s place, Lucille’s, and sometimes the late nights with the guys at cilantro (it’s the only place open after 1am in Maadi, or was until recently)

Soccer Mania: I’m not really into soccer, I attended the semi final of the African cup of nations, it was awesome, and some nice ladies too



Things I had never done prior to 2006/ 2006 firsts

• Accused of trying to hit on my best friend’s girlfriend (at the time)
  
• Started a blog
  
• Attended a Football Match at a stadium
  
• Had lies spread about me (by those closest to me)
  
• Almost died/ Had a bomb explode a couple of meters away from me
  
• Had a friend get scarred for life as a result of that explosion
• Became main suspect in a terrorist act.
• 
  Been interrogated by the police force (peacefully) (for about 24 hours though)
  
• Had my Name Published in the First Page of El Ahram Newspaper (the most circulated newspaper in Egypt) (right below the pic of el rayes kamaan) along with yahoonews, aljazira.com, and Cnn
  
• Was Cleared of all those accusations
  
• Became the only single friend in my group (all are engaged or married)
  
• Kissed a Lesbian (who was willing and Enjoyed it) (I’m guessing enjoyed it since we kissed again on several other occasions) (not a very good lesbian huh?)
• Traveled to Slovakia
  
• Kissed a Woman who was 10 years older than I was (on our first date)
  
• Spent an entire night in a strange Woman’s Bed (yes she was in it at the time) (and no, I didn’t hire her)
  
• Kissed 3 girls in one week, in 2 different continents (2 on the same day)
  
• Inhaled Helium (that was cool)
  
• Met someone online
  
• Became Good Friends with that someone(s)
  
• Had a Friend almost OD on me and the other one fall asleep after one of our friends engagement parties (for about half an hour I was drunk and responsible of taking care of both, before backup came)
  
• Joined a Belly Dancer in her routine in London (not by Choice)
  
• Became somewhat involved with a Girl 2 years my senior
  
• Traveled 6 times in 8 months
  
• Went to Cardiff, Wales
  
• Became Good Friends with a Spanish girl (love you too Chio)
  
• Dealt with 2 Japanese Women (that was fun too)
  
• Read more than all I read combined in the past 3 years
  
  
  On the Political Arena: I’m not into politics awy, I do remember the Lebanon incident, saddam’s execution, the numerous protests in Egypt, The arrest of protesters including bloggers, the mention of Egypt building a nuclear Reactor, Darfur, the democrats getting majority of seats and the Voting Incidents
  
  
  
  Cheers
  
  K

Funny

ME: Ma32oola mesh 2ayleen lel 3arees?

Him: haye3raf keda keda, aslaha tany Gawaza...... haykhosh mesh hayla2y balona yefar2a3ha


i rolled on the floor at the balona expression

Bitter coffee and cigarettes

I like the taste of sugarless coffee, I like the way bitter coffee tastes, the way it makes me feel, the way you can channel that bitterness into something creative to write, I never drink mocha frappes when i’m trying to write, and although I haven’t been doing that lately, I did get to do some writing today, and only when I had my cup of plunger coffee with skimmed milk did I get to writing.

Some people think I only write depressing stuff, I’m not so sure that I only write depressing stuff, but I do think the better stuff I wrote was more depressing than the normal/less depressing stuff I wrote

I have a healthy imagination, not superstar caliber yet, but the older I get the better I become (I think so)


Now coffee aside

You never understand writers block until you get it, I never sympathized with blocked writers and I don’t expect sympathy from non-writers.

The way I deal with it is that I write about anything and everything, like what I’m doing now, to grease/ oil the machine, maybe if you write long enough this will steer you in the right direction, and maybe just maybe you will have something worth writing.

Having time helps though, being distracted with normal everyday stuff is a sure way to stop writing.

I tried a lot of things to get me to write, some songs help, particularly K’s choice songs, and out of all their songs “in your room” does miracles to me.

One more thing I tried and am happy to report that it has worked is scribbling incoherent random shapes on a piece of paper, and repeating that shape over and over (for example a half circle) and connecting those half circles with each other, I take a step back and look at the shape and sometimes I see something in that end result drawing that inspires me to write.

Anyway good luck with what you are doing in 2007

On blogs

How many people do you know follow blogs?

People you might write about?

Sometimes that question comes up to mind, wouldn’t that be a bitch?


My sister found my blog a long while ago, back when I used to write regularly (I think around May), part of that was because I had pointed out some blogs that were worth checking out. (even before I started one myself) eventually she found mine, especially after I wrote about the dahab incident, all she had to do was search for dahab, kareem and arrested, and I came as one of the top matches.

Now I love my sister more than I love any other person in this world, seriously, I’m not saying that just cuz she might be reading this (I’m not sure if she still follows this blog or not), and while some might argue that the tone of this blog is a little bit shocking (to some people, my sister included) her finding out about my blog has affected my writing, ok not to a great deal but still, I usually tell my sister everything, but I leave out the graphic details and I feel the need to write about those details here (everyone loves details, me included)

I’m not saying I write my posts for her or even with her in mind as my audience but it hangs in there at the back of my mind when I do write.

Heartbroken

As I was preparing my backpack for the London trip I stumbled across two short stories I had written back in 2003, and they were as good as what I write now, maybe even better, I was in a zone when I wrote them

So I went to Cardiff (wales) on my second day in london, it rained like hell that day, and I discovered that the water seeped through my backpack and ruined my manuscripts.



And now they are gone, forever




I was almost too devastated to chat up the two Lebanese girls on the bus ride back :)

I remained devastated for about 24 hours

Then I met Marwa (soft music plays in the background)