Monday, July 24, 2006

married & miserable or single & lonely

the title is from chris rock's "never scared"

"ain't no happiness nowhere"

no moving on to more important issues

having a F*ck buddy/ undercover lover

u see, in all the kinds of friends u could have, assholes and anything else, no one comes close to the value for money u get out of a f*#K buddy, even a making out buddy is good

as long as the rules are set straight from the begining and u can both be adults about it that is.

in my short time in dating i have had 2 friends of that kind, actually there was a third but she was an ex so that is some sort of bending the rules.

the main problem u get naturally is when one of u decides he want's more out of this. and it's not the girl all the time that wants more.

the rules are... well they are mainly don't fall in love, don't kiss & tell (optional) and don't call to have me change a tire or help u with something, and i promise to keep u updated on any developments in the emotional department regarding other girls, just so that we keep our guards up

if the current boyfriend/girlfriend requests that we stop meeting then there should be no hard feelings, and definetly no schemes to ruin the relationship (that's a no brainer)

did i miss something???

i'm not sure what else, i am drawing on experience from 2-3 successful tries.

oooh one more thing, there should be no mind games, no pretending to like someone else, no pretending that u like ur fuck buddy, no nonesense at all.... and definetly no getting u chocolate at 4 am none at all

p.s u were not the reason/inspiration behind this post ms. giggles ;)
seriously you weren't but thanks anyway ;)


spanish_moza said...

Hi Kareem...

I don't think this kind of friendship is possible for a person like me. Never worked out when I tried. Actually, I started like that with my current
Your story about the girl demanding chocolate.... is interesting... did you really make her fall for you again just to dump her? It's funny cos I did that with my first boyfriend. I thought revenge was going to be cool... but I never felt good about it and I still don't. I wish I could explain to him one day. btw... I'm 40% obssesive ;-)))

KareemFromEgypt said...

hola moza,

i really did make her fall for me, just for revenge's sake, well it wasn't all revenge ;)

it doesn't feel good but it helps you in being on equal footing later on.

after the revenge, we became friends instead of predator and prey :)

still breathing said...

that's the spirit!

Sand-E Sez said...

The idea of a make out buddy makes sense in a perfect world but it all too often does become very tricky. Doesn't it all get old and boring eventually? I suppose it’s justified when the hormones are raging but what happens when you sit alone and think about what you've done today. Can sexual/physical attention strictly be regarded in the "needs" sense? Should it be unattached to emotion and not associated with an outward display of an inner connection? And when I say inner connection I don’t mean particularly the person but in an inta ma3 nafsak sense and what that person moves in you.

KareemFromEgypt said...

that's always been the spirit walaa, bas mafeesh wa2t :p

sand-e: sex getting boring? why?
the system works sandi, don't fight it :)
we're not talking love here, although they overlap sometimes, still, one needs to know where he stands all the time. plus if it ever gets boring u can still be friends
LOVE the pic btw

still breathing said...

i guess sand-e meant that it'll either transform u into some kind of a lustful animal or make u love that person.

did i get that right?

raghoooda said...

i don't buy that kinda friendship either,sounds so conditional and scary
but i understand you drew from previous tries ya mo3akad inta ;)

KareemFromEgypt said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
KareemFromEgypt said...

meen dah elly mo3akad? Ms. "i'm in love with my married boss" ;)

elly khayef yerawa7, plus it's all about the making out basically

and ur right, i don't make the rules i just tell them raghoody

raghoooda said...

Ya Kareeemmmm grrrrrrrrrrrrrr,,, keda here you attack me wth my weakpoint,that's, of my married boss ,grrrrrri wish i can just hit you now with all stuff infront of me delwa2ty delwa2ty delwa2ty ya kareeem
3omoman i'll overcome this point so soon 3ashan tebatal te3ayerny biha ,,wallahe i'll get over it we hatshooof
i can't help but really feeling like hittin you now, my married boss,,mashy ya Kareem

still breathing said...

look out!!
u got a chick angry... and when she says "delwa2ty" 3 times u automatically know it is not good at all at all at all

P.S that was a cheap card (talking abt u mentioning the boss thing)

Anonymous said...

kareem, i'm back :)
seems you're the only one who cared enough to ask.
so i thought i shouldn't let u worry that much.

PS. would like to keep in touch with u by messenger... so send me an email with ur address so i can add you.

N said...

Isn't this kind of relationship the arab version of casual dating? Or being in a relationship just for fun without it going anywhere?
I assume if you can be friends after then you already are and have fun together, ya3ny you don't just see each other and start going for it. This fuck buddy thing is only messed up because we have double standards, and we can't say right out in our society that we're just messing around with someone. The only problem with this relationship is the word "undercover", it makes it messy, and once again we are forced to be hypocrits and hide behind doors closed firmly by society. If only...

La Gitana said...

if you've had 2-3 successful fuck buddy experiences, then kudos for you! Honestly I havent seen one that's worked out EVER. This hits a bit too close to home right now and I can tell you, turning down pleasures of the flesh because you fear falling in love is hard. All for the sake of a clear conscience. Maybe its a gender thing, but I can't always promise no strings attached.