Depression

Disorder	Your Score
Major Depression:	High-Moderate
Dysthymia:	Slight-Moderate
Bipolar Disorder:	Extremely High
Cyclothymia:	High
Seasonal Affective Disorder:	Moderate
Postpartum Depression:	N/A
Take the Depression Test

thanks Hanouma for the link


i always thought i was chronically depressed, with slight abnormal happy days


i am interessted to know how you guys faired in the same test, tamenoony that i am not the only one who's scored highly on 3 of the 5 categories (you too Malice)



cheers.
K

my penis name

Your Penis Name Is...

Pumping Pole of Penile Power

Penis Name Generator

And to think they got all of this from Kareem, hehe



i went back and tried my full name and i got this

Your Penis Name Is...

Beefy McManstick

Penis Name Generator

i like the first one more

has an official ring to it

by the way this blue template sucks white ass, any place i can get nicer ones other than the ones on blogger.com? suggestions LOLO??

Raghoody Asked


Why do i blog???? raghood asked and i willingly answer, maybe now she'll hook me up with that delectable moody sister of hers


1- why do i blog? well... i guess it's pretty apparent throughout my posts that i'm a very moody person and that i don't adhere to a single theme for my blog, i blog my thoughts and they are as diverse/different as my mood swings (from backstabbing friends passing by second first kisses to songs lyrics and even an occasional Family post, not to mention fidelity) i have mentioned several times that i view blogging as some sort of self therapy and thats why i do it, the only topic i refrain from addressing is politics cuz let's face it i am as tech savvy as i am blonde, so it's probably gonna take "them" about 4 seconds to locate me and i'm sorry but you ain't gonna fuck me.


2- how i started? i signed up to blogger in order to be able to comment on certain blogs, i signed up in december and my first post was in feb about Valentine's day it started as an introductory post about me then evolved into my theory on that Fugly day.

how i was introduced to blogs is through manal and alaa i was googling wi-fi hotspots in egypt and immediatley i was hooked, it's not everyday you find people writting about airplane wankers and in arabic kamaan, pure genius, and it's through manal and alaa that i was introduced to other's like sandmonkey and later on through sandmonkey i discovered yasjess and so on i began stumbling accross more and more blogs, i have been following blogs since july 2005 (more or less)

3- will there be a day when i'll quit blogging and delete it all? can't really say if i'll quit or not, whenever i feel like i'm losing interest, some event happens and you feel like you must vent out, i guess life will always present bloggable thoughts to us, in any case i'd never delete "the truth" even if i quit, it's my first, plus i feel that there might be some people who would be interested in reading it. plus it's near criminal to assassinate thoughts once they've been put to pen and paper or in this case blog, i am extremely annoyed when there's a blog i follow and have some of it's posts on my fav list is deleted and i wouldn't want to do this to anybody

I'm turning 24 on the 24th



HEEEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAAAA


time for a celberation everybody, pop the champagne bottles, party on


as if anybody should need a cause for celebration



and for this memeorable occasion allow me to quote mr Kanye West in his song celebration





Yeah, you know what this is
It's a celebration, bitches!
Grab a drink, grab a glass
After that I grab yo ass


and also




But, I just thought you should know
We hit the liquor store
Got some Cris and some Mo
And we about to let it floooooow

Had some problems before
but see we let em go
Got an ounce of that dro
And we about to let it blooooooow ho, ho ho

ho, ho , looking for some hoe's haaaaay



hehe3



actually it's still tomorrrow but heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa wwwoooohhooooooo


i'm heehaawing from today and will continue till sunday morning



get me something nice

Thanks mom




my sister is constructing a family tree on some website

she was talking with us over lunch today about how she didn't know the full name of our grandma (my dad's mother) and she had to leave it at her first name

and my mom was like: oh honey, it's (so and so) i wrote it in your photo album as soon as you were born

I just had to interrupt: oh mommy dearest, what does it say in MY photo album ( i am evil)

my mom: "silence"/ blank stare


my mom: i wuv you



being a first born is cool, being anythingelseborn sucks white ass




p.s. I wuvv you too mommy

But nothing compares to these blue and yellow purple pills



so what's up with the good ole rents? what are they thinking ya3ni?

it's been a while snce they acted crazy

i thought they outgrew it

last weekend all hell broke loose after they went for a lunch together

i got a call after meeting up with a friend of mine in city stars on saturday

phone rings

me: hello
my sister: enta fein? (where are you?)
me: i am in masr el gedida
Sis: your mom and dad got in a fight (just like the good old days)
me:why?
sis: i dunno, all three of us were having lunch and it was all good then on the way home something went FUBAR
me: how bad is it?
Sis: well... she left the house and doesn't us to want to tell him where she is, says if he really cares then he should call
me: hmmm... that's new


now the problem is that my mom is the kind of person who if approached about a certain problem, she enjoys the attention and magnifies the whole thing ( so we didn't wanna talk with her so as not to make matters worse) i figured she was going to my aunt (khalty) because she has a sprained back and can't move at all, so i called there

and to my surprise i find that my -usually calm and usually defensive of my dad- aunt is also bouncing off the walls (wierd?) and saying stuff like "no, your dad has gone too far this time" and i was like WHAT STUFF???? i don't understand and both of them replied "i can't tell you, ask him, if he wants to say"

i ask her if she wants me to come ack to maadi and she says no stay out with your friends

so i figured maybe this wasn't an episode of mom overreacting and maybe the guy did something wrong


Next day (sunday morning)


i get a phone call from dad which was mainly about work stuff and after we were done i ask him about the previous day


Dad: abadan yabny omak fehmet ghalat (nothing son, your mom misunderstood) he was quite calm actually
me:well, she seemed like she was enraged
Dad: asl heya la2et 3elbet viagra kont gayebha li ankelak (A) 3ashan howa beyetkesef yotlob men doctor (R) (she found a box of viagra that i had brought to uncle (A) [who happens to be his best friend] because (A) is embarresed to ask doctor (R) [another pharmasist friend of theirs]
me: ya ragel uncle (A) bardo??!!! (for Uncle (A) you say?)
Dad: yes and i told her so but she want's to believe otherwise
me: well... i wouldn't believe you (she has her reasons to doubt)
Dad: normally she may have had but not in that case, to start the box was sealed, not to mention that doctors forbid me from using it because of my heart, and she knows that!!! plus if i wanted to hide it don't you think i would have found a better place than than the glove compartment? (in our line of business you learn how to hide stuff)
me: well you might have a point, did you tell her?
dad: i told her, but she doesn't wanna believe me
me: she will, just give her time, i think



so there you have it folks, it's not enough that they are very incompatable and that they mix like oil and ice tea, now we have my dad's close friend (A) and pfizer to worry about as well, god bless pharmaceuticals and horny mid-life men


another reason why i believe my dad is that he is my dad, therfore we don't need viagra :D

this reminds me of a parody song by [flight of the conchords] called "business time" in which the guy says:


making love
making love for
making love for twoooooo
making love for twooooooooo minutes


when it's with me, you only need two minutes..... because I'M INTENSE


two minutes in heaven.......... is better than one minute in heaven (LOL)



so do you believe PAPA???? actually i do because he did have surgey without telling us at all ( i found out when i was looking around in his desk for some work related stuff a year later and found his will he had wrote and explaination for what to do after he's gone) so it's not just a lame "oh my weak heart" parental excuse

Some more blogthings

just for the F#$K of it

You Should Be A Cancer

What's good about you: you're incredibly kind, caring, and generous What's bad about you: you can be too moody and impossible to understand In love: you enjoy wining and dining the object of your affection In friendship, you're: likely to depend on other friends for emotional support Your ideal job: historian, marine biologist, or religious figure Your sense of fashion: you dress to match your mood You like to pig out on: classic home cooked meals, like mac and cheese

What Sign Should You Be?

You are 93% Gemini

How Gemini Are You?

i told you ya nerro that i have a lot of Gemini in me

the funny thing is that i AM a cancer fe3lan and i was born on the cusp (hint hint) which makes me a little bit of both signs



do you believe in star signs? in any way at all?

i like to believe that there is some truth in them, at least in the statistical analysis sense (for the nonbelievers out there) that's how it started

they compiled about 100,000 people born let's say between june 22 and july 21st in cancerians situation and they found out that the majority act in this or that way, and that the people born between nov-dec also act in a different way from cancerians yet similiar to each other

now as the old saying goes "if it looks like shit and smells like shit, it probably is shit" i can't help but believe that star signs (or being born in a certain month) has an effect on the character


anyway enough with the fluffy posts, will resume with the usual wierd posts later

p.s remind me to tell you about my mom and dad's incident next time

okay, so who agrees??

Your Blog Should Be Purple

You're an expressive, offbeat blogger who tends to write about anything and everything. You tend to set blogging trends, and you're the most likely to write your own meme or survey. You are a bit distant though. Your blog is all about you - not what anyone else has to say.

What Color Should Your Blog or Journal Be?

And

You Are 80% Cynical

You're a full blown cynic... and probably even skeptical of these results. You have your optimistic moments, but most likely you keep them to yourself.

How Cynical Are You?

anybody with the purple colour idea? i was thinking green or blue


as for the cynical result it just alarmed me so i figured what the hell

Template change???



i was wondering if i should change the black template that some people have been complaining about, to be honest even i am starting to get bored of it a little bit, it can get quite depressing, what do you think?


feedback needed

Dreams, nightmares, whatever




for the second day in a row i am rudely woken up from an afternoon nap by a nasty nightmare.

both had to do with fighting or struggling and i usually wake up kicking at something, in the first i was even swimming ( lots of symbols for people interested in dreams )

i am messed up, and it only took me 1 day of work to get me back to nasty nightmares after a wonderful time in dubai


i'm waiting for tomorrow's episode

i'm in dubai


enjoying a much needed break from the world and blogging


p.s that apartment club rules



till then ba2a, i will write details later

Public displays of affection


again i dislike bloggers who have song lyrics all over their blog, but i am allowing for yet another exception (as i can relate to them tremendously)



They’re for all to see
Selfcontained lovers
Welded orally
No run for cover

I’d join in the fun
If I had someone
But it seems I’m undone

These public displays of affection
Surely your love must be new
I can’t wait for my next rejection
I’m always the first in the queue

Try to hold your soul
But I’ll crush your spirit
Why do I feel so close?
When I can’t get near it

I’m flooded with fear
And it don’t disappear
But I’m still standing here

These public displays of affection
Surely your love must be new
So conscious of my imperfections
I’ve never lost interest in you

These public displays of affection
Surely your love must be new
You’re natural overprotection
Leaves me with nothing to do

These public displays of affection
Surely your love must be new
I’ve got no time for reflection
My service is long overdue


sung by morcheeba

dunno why but it's one of the songs that i like to listen to almost daily, suits all my moods.


enjoy it



we are continually looking/sriving for love/being with someone and for some reason i am always aware that eventually it will all go wrong, or you will get married


i don't want to get married, i have made my decision.

i might sound childish, or someone may say "oh, kareem you're young, wait and you'll find someone good for you", i might find someone good for me but not perfect, not that i am a perfection chaser but in the end i am a very complex, highly emotional yet extremly detached (the detachment comes as a self defense mechanism) person, and i doubt that the near impossible task of finding a next-to-perfect match is gonna be more work than the reward of finding them, cuz in the end it all fizzles out when your loves ceases to be new. ( nope i'll choose selfish/incapable of love, please)


PLUS people change, that's a given, everybody will tell you that people change so why bother searching for someone that in a few years ( after you change) won't be that appealing to you anymore

maybe that's the reason behind the "new love" phrase

maybe the real reason people either break up or stay only for the kids/ old times sake is that the fact that they have changed, they just don't know it

i haven't found a couple that i envy till now, 90% of the cases i feel sorry for, the other 10 percent i feel happy for but yet wouldn't want what they have. is it just me? am i emotionally crippled in that sense? or am i the only sane one?


okay give me one good, successful, envy-worthy couple and i'll show you a couple full of shit or lies or both

i'm gonna finish writting for tonite, cuz i am on the border of typing gibberish and blahblahbloooos (i'm starting to get worked up/angry) obviously it's a topic i feel strongly about




and you all thought this was another silly lyrics post, i thought so too

Blogging with no face on



hmmm... i noticed that most blogs i follow have no photo in the profile, even Jem back when she had a photo it wasn't a full photo it was just the corner of her mouth. the only exception is Manal and Alaa's blog and i follow them for the obvious reasons.


i just realized this recently, photos automatically bias you either towards or against a blogger, in my case most times it was against.
i just can't take a blogger (who's okay with everybody knowing who they are) seriously, i like to read about people's feelings (sort of a peeping tom) on their blogs, never was interested in the "today i went to work, had a sandawetsh fool and gaaly eshaal" blogger.

one other thing, i just saw a pic of one of the bloggers i follow daily, if i had met her in real life i probably would have never noticed her, and had i seen her photo before reading what she had to say i would have never ever paid attention, probably would have been my last visit to her blog, not that she would have cared aslan (she has a looooot of readers, i doubt she does it for people anyway, none of us should, it helps to have readers but yet no one started out with readers) but i would have missed out on getting to know her better through her blog, she doesn't strike me as the person in the photo, she looked older in it and not well dressed ( she sounds much younger, and a lot more vain on her blog)

i have a problem with judging people, i do it all the time, and it's subconcious too, within 2 seconds i profile people according to how they look, THEN i start listening, sometimes you can't help but be biased by what you see (it's a bad thing but i can't help) and with anonymous bloggers you get to form an unbiased opinion and you get to read deep emotions that the non-annonymous bloggers don't talk about

if only i could do so in real life

Yearning


As I was writing today’s date for some work related thing I found myself remembering the fabulous (F)


Don’t know if it was the warm weather, the fact that we hooked up in summer around late June, the fact that her birthday was last month and I didn’t call ( I haven’t called in two years)


Remembering her bothered me and for about 10 minutes I was frowning and in a very bad mood, I let it go after 10 minutes but again I am not appreciative of the fact that I remember her till now. It was supposed to be a one night stand, granted it was a two-night stand but still, I always prided myself in being able to keep viewing things as they were, in their right size, and I have always succeeded in doing so.


Remembering your flings is usually a pleasant feeling, it helps you give your ego a much needed boost sometimes, I never felt the need to forget about one of my past relationships whether it was just a fling or a full fledged romance, never had an eternal sunshine of the spotless mind moment where all the memories got too much to handle

And I know the reason we didn’t continue our fling (it had potential) was that the social gap was too big, I didn’t see any future for this and I hated holding her back. Oooh and I was seeing someone at the moment


I don’t know if this is the first time for me to admit to cheating, it’s not an easy thing to admit to cheating on your partner, someone that you care for deeply and might have even loved at the time (everybody has his moments). I was never caught, something that alarmed me very much, how was I able to have (F) in my arms then 1 hour later welcome my girlfriend back from her trip and never even be doubted for a moment? And if I had that in me then what was to stop me later? I don’t want to be a cheating husband, don’t want to grow up like my dad who is my role model in business and having fun but not in matters of commitment and monogamy


And something else, like the song “cheat on you” by Ma$e “just you can cheat they can cheat” and that bothered me too, if I was doing so then maybe she was doing the same back to me, not saying I didn’t deserve being cheated on, just that I didn’t notice anything incriminating, and I trust my power of observation in these matters


Is cheating and not getting caught a talent or a skill? that's a good question, (are good cheaters born or made?)


So moving back to (F) and why we didn’t hook up, I guess it’s way too late now to think about it or even reminisce, but I wonder what if?


The phenomenal trend that is blogging allows you to judge a person’s character on some level before your judgment is skewed by their looks, status or attitude but that’s a different story altogether for next post